Why I love my Legal Counsel. I'm flipping around the channels during a Daily Show commercial break, and I stop on "The Situation with Tucker Carlson." Because I figure somebody should. Tucker's got some yahoo on the show who has apparently written an anti-Al Franken screed titled "Pants on Fire" or something with equal gravitas. Tucker says to the guy, "To be honest, I haven't read your book." A ringing endorsement off the bat. "I don't even know if what you write in here is true."

And because I can't help myself, I have to jabber something about just how poor that is. To which my Legal Counsel points out that Bill O'Reilly would automatically be agreeing with this hoser, and she says, "Tucker's a pussy." I ask if I can quote her on that, and she says, "It's true. I speak the truth."