God and Guns, Part 1. It can only mean one thing...a weekend in Virginia. I had Friday off thanks to the alternative work schedule offered to certain federal employees, so I decided to pack a bag and head on down to the Star City of the South for a couple of nights. Driving down late Friday morning, once I hit I-81, I decided to switch over to the radio for a while just to see what I could find. And right on cue, the deejay of the one rock station I could pick up announces that continuing with the forty minute rock block, ZZ Top would be up next. I have never been a proponent of playing ZZ Top anywhere at anytime. Okay, you've got beards (well, two and one moustache) and sunglasses, and you twirl around your guitars. Very cute. We get it. Before I could find out whether it would be "Sharp Dressed Man" or "Gimme All Your Lovin," I hit search on the radio.

Around mile marker 271, the radio dial stopped on a station called "The Cross," and it was the all-request hour. And what came next was something I was completely unprepared for. It was Southpaw with "Baby Got Book." Watch the video here. Christian rap set to the tune of Sir Mixx-a-lot's "Baby Got Back." It's as awful/awesome as it sounds. For example:

Oh baby, I wanna read witcha
Cause your Bible's got pictures
My minister tried to console me
But that Book you got makes ("M-m-me so holy")

Don't say I never did anything for you. It was the strangest radio experience since riding back from a spring break trip to Florida with Dr.Schoolboy in 1995 and hearing the Rednex "Cottoneye Joe" at 4 a.m. just outside of Charlotte. Shortly thereafter, Dr.Schoolboy proclaimed, "Best Western...they have the best food." But he didn't have a monopoly on wisdom for earlier in the day I observed, "You know, there are beaches along the coast," which led to a two hour search for Vero Beach.

Tune back in later for God and Guns, Part 2 in which James plays with safely and respectfully handles firearms.