Dog. This is Tiberius, winner of the 26th annual Drake Most Beautiful Bulldog Contest. Kick ass.


With the crown, he looks like the JMU Duke Dog.

In 7th grade, we had one elective course to choose from three options--Band, Choir, and a third cleverly designed course, "Interest Block." Having neither vocal nor musical skills (a couple of years of piano lessons and a Casio synthesizer notwithstanding), I opted for Interest Block. The course was organized as a four-part class with each nine weeks devoted to a different subject--art, music, home ec., and shop (though shop was probably called "industrial tech" or something equally misleading). And each nine weeks, I would have an opportunity to demonstrate my inability to work with my hands in a new way, whether it was painting with watercolors, playing the recorder, or sewing a pillow. I think all we did in shop was cut some wood with a bandsaw, and I didn't lose a finger, so that was a success.

The first nine weeks, my class was in the art rotation. One of our projects was to make a clay whistle in the shape of an animal. My older brother was in his first year at JMU, and so I thought, why don't I make a whistle in the shape of the JMU Duke Dog? And rather than buy him a Xmas present from the drug store like I usually would do, I could give him the whistle for Xmas. Surely that is the one thing a college dorm room would be missing. Excellent idea. But like I said, I'm not the most artistic fellow. And so after molding the clay, firing it, painting it, and firing it again, the Duke Dog whistle ended up looking more like some sort of super-cow wearing a crown and a cape. Not that my brother much cared when I gave it to him; he was probably hung-over like he was Xmas morning two years before.

And that's what Tiberius reminded me of.