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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Droopy Drawers. More on the Virginia House of Delegates' plans to let loose the fashion police.


(Proposed by the House Committee for Courts of Justice on February 4, 2005)

(Patron Prior to Substitute--Delegate Howell, A.T.)

A BILL to amend the Code of Virginia by adding a section numbered 18.2-387.1, relating to indecent display of below-waist undergarments.

Be it enacted by the General Assembly of Virginia:

1. That the Code of Virginia is amended by adding a section numbered 18.2-387.1 as follows:

§ 18.2-387.1. Indecent display of underwear.
Any person who, while in a public place, intentionally wears and displays his below-waist undergarments, intended to cover a person's intimate parts, in a lewd or indecent manner, shall be subject to a civil penalty of no more than $50. "Intimate parts" has the same meaning as in § 18.2-67.10.
FYI: Code 18.2-67.10 defines "intimate parts" as "the genitalia, anus, groin, breast, or buttocks of any person."

A couple more things on this. How will they define intent? What if you didn't know that your pants are sagging down so low as to reveal your drawers? And what if the undergarments are designed in such a way that they aren't intended to cover those intimate parts? What about crotchless underwear? Or edible undergarments? What if someone is wearing underwear over their pants while simultaneously having underwear on under the pants, and the underwear beneath the pants is not on display? And what about people who wear boxer shorts as regular shorts? Will that count? What if I want to run around with a pair of tighty-whities on my head? Would I be subject to the $50 fine? I need to know.

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