How many beers does it take to get a black bear drunk? Thirty-six, apparently (link via Mike). Much more creative than a picnic basket. The other animals of the forest said they can't stand it when the bear gets this drunk, "He just comes back in the forest and starts pissing all over everything," said an area squirrel. A local raccoon chimed in, "At first, it's kinda funny, because the bear is just like over and over, 'I love you guys, you're the best!' But then eventually, he just starts crying, and we have to reassure him of what a good bear he is." Said the squirrel, "It's really just annoying. And have you ever seen a bear piss after guzzling two cases of beer? Lemme tell ya, there's a reason they call it "Yellowstone Park."